Have you ever tried to squeeze into an article of clothing that you know was too small but you thought you would try anyway? Have you ever worn shoes that were too small because you they made your feet look cute but they ended up giving you blisters? That same thing happens everyday when we try to keep things in our lives that just don’t fit. Sometimes we have friends that simply are no good for us but we remain in their company and as a result get hurt and the same thing goes for relationships. When we are willing to go through pain and suffering for something that is not healthy that hinges on insanity. One must begin to ask themselves what am I getting out of this? Why is it that I stay in this relationship even though it hurts? Why do I hang around in that place that I always get in trouble at? The hard questions deserve real answers. If it doesn’t fit and it’s bringing you pain it’s definitely time to give it up.
What makes a mother a MOM ?
Mother’s Day is just a blink away! Sunday morning services will be filled, greetings of Happy Mother’s day will fill the air and many women will be on cloud nine. It is the day that has been designated to honor those that play the role of mother; those who cook, clean, nurse their children back to health, issue discipline and encouragement. Even those who don’t do these things will jump on the bandwagon! That leads to the question of what a MOM really is. Being a parent is a hard job especially in times like these. Children have to be taken care of physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially. What makes a mother a MOM?
Nobody wants a good guy or girl until………..
Bad boys and bad girls are all the rage these days. They are splashed on the covers of magazines, they have invaded prime time television with their fighting and egos and are literally everywhere. Fathers that have daughters have nightmares about their little girls marrying Mr. Wrong. Mothers will fight tooth and nail for their sons not to marry “Bad Girls” In the dating arena no one wants to date or marry a nerd and no one wants to have a homely woman on their arm. The people who fit into these categories are often ignored throughout their school years. Nerds don’t always stay nerds and ugly ducklings often turn into swans. When you decide that you want a bad boy or girl take caution because they may evolve into bad men and women. Once the bad girls and bad boys have taken you for a ride you may end up bitter and worn out. After you’re tired you may realize that Mr and Miss Good weren’t so bad after all but you may have run yourself to the point that they want nothing to do with a person like you. Choose wisely so you don’t end up with a Mr. or Mrs. Wrong.
How do we deal with something we don’t want to talk about?
The CDC estimates 1.1 million people in the U.S are living with HIV the virus that causes Aids.
African Americans represent 59% of the newly diagnosed HIV cases in Chicago, Caucasians represent 23% of the newly diagnosed HIV cases in Chicago, and Latinos represented 16% of the newly diagnosed cases of HIV in Chicago according to www.aidschicago.org
With numbers this staggering why so much silence? Why do the discussions occur so infrequently? Is it because of shame? Are people really that out of touch with reality? There has also been a surge of new diagnoses of individuals between the ages of 13&24. Just like violence is attacking our youth so is silence. What can we do to combat this problem? Is it a matter of education or are new people contracting HIV because of deeper issues? It’s time to create healthy conversations and develop plans of action. If we continue this culture of silence the numbers will continue to grow. What’s your opinion? Give us your 2 cents!
For information on HIV & AIDS http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/
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Faith, Family and Finances
It’s a new year! Get your 2012 started out with the 3 F’s Faith, Family and Finances per Michael Nwoke. Get your houses in order! Faith- Strengthen your relationship with your creator so that when the storms come you won’t fold. If you are unable to stand in your faith you definitely can’t help others. Those who are not sound in faith are easily tossed back and forth. Who can you help with unstable faith? NO ONE! Family- We need to fix relationships that are broken and work on mending them. The family has been divided and torn apart by personality differences, incidents that no one wants to speak on and a lack of passing down generational knowledge. Family members who are out of control need to be reigned in. How many of us see family members that are totally out of control and no one wants to say anything? It seems that we are more concerned with hurting people’s feelings than putting them on the right path. Pinpoint sources of drama and division in your family and deal with them. Begin saving for investment purposes and big ticket items. We must also work on building and repairing our credit. 2012 can be the year you are liberated or it can be more of the same mistakes, it’s totally up to you!
UMOJA- UNITY How can we unify our families, communities?
Today is the first day of Kwanzaa! This is my first year celebrating so I am really exciting about learning more about this celebration. Today Umoja is the focus which means unity; to strive for and maintain unity in the family, community, nation and race. As I think about blacks as a people, I know that we have a very rich history and we are a great people. We were stolen from our continent our land was pillaged and taken over we were made slaves when we were brought to America and other countries. The effect of slavery and colonialism has broken our families, our race and our traditions. Today it seems as if we are a people far removed from many of the values and traditions of our Motherland. What has taken place of those traditions? On the surface our traditions have been replaced with those of our captors. Our holidays erased and replaced, our values substituted with those of the slave master and our love for ourselves turned into hate from what we naturally are which is why many industries generate billions of dollars yet we do not have a stake in them. Our families were ripped apart and sold and that has had destructive effects even in 2011. How can we unify our families and our communities today?
You’re attitude determines if you are winning!
Many people have heard the phrase your attitude determines your altitude; its not just some cliche statement. The way your day goes is determined by the program that you currently have running through your head. What makes us have a bad day? Is it the actual problems that we have or the way in which we tackle those problems. Many people have attitudes that are pessimistic, defeatist, and all around negative. There is no way you can be considered a winner if you don’t have the attitude of a winner. The funny thing about it is that you choose what attitude you have. It’s not something that you don’t have control over or is chosen for you. You are 100 % in control. How do you develop a winning attitude? First you must accept responsibility for your behavior, secondly you must decide not to let circumstances determine how you are going to act, thirdly be positive regardless of what the situation is. Choose to be a winner!!
Girls Gone Wild!!
That was then and this is now; whenever you talk about how things used to be that is typically the response. There are some aspects of yesterday that worked however, many have been convinced that they are no longer valuable today. Today I want to talk about young and older ladies actually behaving like ladies. I know that this is a touchy topic which is why I want to talk about it. I do not believe in not addressing things, its that mindset that keep people stumbling over problems. If you turn on the television you see a large number of shows that showcase women in a not so flattering way. Some of the shows that show women behaving badly are: The Bad Girls Club, Basketball Wives, Mob Wives The Housewives of ATL etc, etc. While this may be entertaining television it showcases an ever growing trend;girls going wild and behaving badly. There was once a time when dresses were knee length and one would never walk out of the house without pantyhose if they were wearing a dress but now you see many pictures in the tabloids of women with their underwear showing or no panties on at all. Not only has clothing changed but behavior has changed as well. Today you may experience a woman cussing worse than a sailor and having no shame at all because its now acceptable for a woman to do so. A few weeks ago we saw two women beat by a Mcdonald’s employee because they decided to cuss, slap and jump behind the counter of the establishment. What changed? Some women today also believe that they can be as sexually active as a man gone wild meaning they can sleep with as many people and not face the stigma that goes with it. We know that in the case of sleeping around the rules are different. Why is it socially acceptable for women to act in this manner as opposed to the “old days” Can we blame it on women’s liberation? In being liberated did all of the rules go out of the window? How do you think women should behave? Is it acceptable to come out of the house looking any kind of way in pajamas, satin sleeping bonnets, showing everything that God gave you? Is it acceptable to be unlady like? If you are a man is this the type of woman that you would commit to in a marriage? If you are a woman would you cosign your daughter behaving in this way. Would you want your son or daughter to bring home a girl that has gone wild? Have the girls truly gone wild ?