Today is the first day of Kwanzaa! This is my first year celebrating so I am really exciting about learning more about this celebration. Today Umoja is the focus which means unity; to strive for and maintain unity in the family, community, nation and race. As I think about blacks as a people, I know that we have a very rich history and we are a great people. We were stolen from our continent our land was pillaged and taken over we were made slaves when we were brought to America and other countries. The effect of slavery and colonialism has broken our families, our race and our traditions. Today it seems as if we are a people far removed from many of the values and traditions of our Motherland. What has taken place of those traditions? On the surface our traditions have been replaced with those of our captors. Our holidays erased and replaced, our values substituted with those of the slave master and our love for ourselves turned into hate from what we naturally are which is why many industries generate billions of dollars yet we do not have a stake in them. Our families were ripped apart and sold and that has had destructive effects even in 2011. How can we unify our families and our communities today?
Many people have heard the phrase your attitude determines your altitude; its not just some cliche statement. The way your day goes is determined by the program that you currently have running through your head. What makes us have a bad day? Is it the actual problems that we have or the way in which we tackle those problems. Many people have attitudes that are pessimistic, defeatist, and all around negative. There is no way you can be considered a winner if you don’t have the attitude of a winner. The funny thing about it is that you choose what attitude you have. It’s not something that you don’t have control over or is chosen for you. You are 100 % in control. How do you develop a winning attitude? First you must accept responsibility for your behavior, secondly you must decide not to let circumstances determine how you are going to act, thirdly be positive regardless of what the situation is. Choose to be a winner!!
That was then and this is now; whenever you talk about how things used to be that is typically the response. There are some aspects of yesterday that worked however, many have been convinced that they are no longer valuable today. Today I want to talk about young and older ladies actually behaving like ladies. I know that this is a touchy topic which is why I want to talk about it. I do not believe in not addressing things, its that mindset that keep people stumbling over problems. If you turn on the television you see a large number of shows that showcase women in a not so flattering way. Some of the shows that show women behaving badly are: The Bad Girls Club, Basketball Wives, Mob Wives The Housewives of ATL etc, etc. While this may be entertaining television it showcases an ever growing trend;girls going wild and behaving badly. There was once a time when dresses were knee length and one would never walk out of the house without pantyhose if they were wearing a dress but now you see many pictures in the tabloids of women with their underwear showing or no panties on at all. Not only has clothing changed but behavior has changed as well. Today you may experience a woman cussing worse than a sailor and having no shame at all because its now acceptable for a woman to do so. A few weeks ago we saw two women beat by a Mcdonald’s employee because they decided to cuss, slap and jump behind the counter of the establishment. What changed? Some women today also believe that they can be as sexually active as a man gone wild meaning they can sleep with as many people and not face the stigma that goes with it. We know that in the case of sleeping around the rules are different. Why is it socially acceptable for women to act in this manner as opposed to the “old days” Can we blame it on women’s liberation? In being liberated did all of the rules go out of the window? How do you think women should behave? Is it acceptable to come out of the house looking any kind of way in pajamas, satin sleeping bonnets, showing everything that God gave you? Is it acceptable to be unlady like? If you are a man is this the type of woman that you would commit to in a marriage? If you are a woman would you cosign your daughter behaving in this way. Would you want your son or daughter to bring home a girl that has gone wild? Have the girls truly gone wild ?
A thread that I read about earlier inspired today’s post. In the world of dating there are rules; what you should do on a first date, how much is too much to spend, who picks up the bill, literally tons of them. I believe however there are some things that are simply a no no! Dating is typically a step in the direction of courting and courting marriage and along the way there are just certain things that should not be done. An example of a rule that is broken time and time again is the whole sleeping with a person on the first date controversy. Is it a wise thing? Some say yes its 2011 and its perfectly fine; others say absolutely not if you give away something that is supposedly precious to you that quick there is no way you will be respected. Another example that I want to give is expecting money from a person or them footing the bill for major purchases or expenses. I am rather old fashioned and think that these are things you should expect from people in a covenant relationship while others think its perfectly okay to expect someone you are not joined with to make it rain dollars on you? What’s your opinion? Does membership have its privileges or should everything be open whether you are dating, courting or married?
There seems to be a new trend where parents are not able to do anything with their children what happened?
There is nothing new under the sun I believe that children have not changed so much but I believe that parenting styles have. What’s your opinion?
CNN Contributor wrote an article that pretty much stated that Social Security as we know it will not be around in the years to come. YES that means the money they are taking out of your check to give to retirees possibly won’t be around when you get to retirement age. If social security isn’t going to be around when you retirement what is your Plan B? I think depending on the government to do anything but lie is too much dependence. Sure many have benefited from programs like food stamps, welfare, medicare, disability but can’t the government just pull the rug from you at anytime and cry broke AND get away with it. I think that the American people need to get back to entrepreneurship and start depending on themselves and of course GOD. So what are you going to do seeing as though the well is going dry? Will you sit idle and wait for things to go bust or will you get to work storing up your own nest egg?
Check out the full story at http://www.cnn.com/2011/09/20/opinion/granderson-social-security/index.html
In life we all accumulate baggage. We collect baggage from our life experiences. We collect items in every relationship that we are in. Sometimes we collect good things and at other times we collect bad things. Being able to be productive in spite of the baggage that we have is not an easy task as adults and for a child it is 10x’s harder. The question that I place before us all today is on behalf of those who are on the front lines teaching. What things can an educator do to get past the baggage that many children are bringing into the classroom to educate the nations children?
A parent made the comment that you have to be harder on girls than you do on the boys ;What’s your opinion? Does being less demanding with male children ruin them? If you take a look at certain communities you see that the female in most cases is the parent who has custodial rights and often times the father is not involved could it be that its the effect of more responsibility being placed on the female child. In addition in many families the matriarch is more dominant than the patriarch what roles does being more lenient on boys play in their success?